Defining True Success in Youth Ministry

MARK WILLIAMS

A few years ago, I was at a national student ministry convention with thousands of other youth workers. Part of the morning included gathering by region and networking with other youth workers in our area. “How many students do you have in your ministry?” was the question I was asked repeatedly all morning—actually all weekend. I began to wonder if this was all that mattered. After the first few times, I began to answer “a good number” or “a bunch”. Each time an accurate count of my actual numbers was requested. I could discern a sense of competition had arisen among us, and I wondered what God thought of all of us posturing and comparing our ministries.

Through my observations, I noticed a curious trend. Youth workers would almost apologize if they had a “small ministry” while those with the largest ministries made sure we all knew how big their numbers really were. I wondered that weekend if we have lost perspective in terms of “success” in American youth ministry. While we compare and count our sheep, are our existing ministries really effective in reaching and discipling teenagers to maturity in Christ?

In this article, I want to identify what we think success looks like and then offer one picture of what I have to come to believe God thinks success looks like.

What We Think

1. Big numbers (You had how many show up?)

In my early days of ministry, numbers were everything for me. I counted everyone that entered our building for a program and reported it weekly to our pastor. If we had a low attendance one night, I was usually depressed and discouraged. On the other hand, if we were bursting at the seams, I was excited and pumped up about everything. I went to ridiculous lengths to get students to bring more students on “friend” nights (this even included kissing a sheep on the mouth!?!). The more our numbers grew, the more impressed I felt our church was with the youth ministry. When we began to top 100 students each week, I was convinced that I had reached a new level of success in ministry. I thought that I had arrived.

Obviously, in the Bible, big numbers do not always equate with success. In Judges 7, we find Gideon leading army of 32,000 Israelites into battle against the Midianites. Verse 2 states, “The LORD said to Gideon,

You have too many men for me to deliver Midian into their hands. In order that Israel may not boast against me that her own strength has saved her…”

Through an interesting process of elimination, God reduced the size of the Israelite army to only 300 men. Carrying trumpets and torches into battle, Gideon and his 300 men routed the Midianites and won the victory.

Over the years, I have become convinced that God is not concerned with how many students come to my ministry, but rather, what I do with those students. If I draw a big crowd but don’t encourage those students to commit their lives to Jesus and help them grow to maturity in him, am I really successful in what God has called me to be? Big numbers without long-term faith just didn’t seem to add up to “success” for me anymore.

2. Big Budgets and Packed Calendars (what are we doing tomorrow?)

Before I had children, my wife and I had “all the time in the world” for the youth at our church. They were our family, and we planned to spend as much time with them as possible. The monthly calendars were overflowing with fellowships, skate nights, outreach events, worship services, trips, and anything else we could fit into each week. I remember having a group of parents request a meeting with me about a year into a particular ministry. I was expecting lots of encouragement and praise, but instead received a request to “have mercy” on them as parents. They complained that their teenagers were never home, that they were really tired of driving to the church everyday, and that they felt bad if they told their youth that they couldn’t participate in a church-related activity. I was stunned. I was sure that “successful” ministries had something going on virtually every night of the week. Additionally, bigger successful ministries planned bigger and better events each year which required more and more money in the youth ministry budget. My ministries fell into the cycle of more kids were drawn by more activities which required more money. As each number grew, I felt more important and successful.

When I read about the first church in Acts chapter 2, I see a completely different picture. I see a group of committed believers with little to no resources or funds simply spending time together in relationships as families. They had no church calendar, no planned crusades, no church buses, and no live TV feed. Even so, the Lord blessed the church to where it was growing daily in both number and passion rather than activities and budgets. Today, the church is growing the fastest in places without resources, funds, church property, or publicity. In America, with our event calendars and bug budgets, we have created a consumer culture of churchgoers who will settle for nothing less than the best product we can offer. And yet, is all of this activity without direction really “success”?

3. Praise and Adoration (if it weren’t for you…)

As my smaller ministry grew into a larger, I was showered with compliments and affirmation from every direction in my church. The pastor was pleased, most of the parents were happy, and the senior adults thought “that kid we hired to play with the youth” was doing a great job. I began to hear and believe statements that started with, “If it weren’t for you….” The students cried if anyone brought up the possibility of me one day leaving the church. The Lord blessed our ministry, and it became “the” youth ministry in our community. Other churches brought their teenagers over to experience our Wednesday night program. I became very arrogant and impressed with myself.

To see how foolish it is to buy into the popularity game, you don’t have to look any farther than the life of Jesus. I can’t help but think about the crowds that lined the streets for Jesus’ triumphal entry. They were waving palm branches and laying down their cloaks shouting “Hosanna! Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord.” Jesus’ popularity had reached an all time high. His approval rating was through the roof! A week later, these same people cried out to have Jesus crucified. Fame is fleeting, especially in ministry. The same people who eagerly helped you unpack the moving van may just as eagerly force you to pack it again. Affirmation doesn’t always equal “success” and it doesn’t necessarily mean that God is pleased with you as well.

4. Conversions and Baptisms (and the winner is…)

Having a growing ministry with a busy calendar in an excited church isn’t actually enough to reach the highest level of success in ministry. With all of those events (that cost all that money) designed to draw all of those students comes the expectation that each month new students will actually be willing to trust Christ as Savior, to make a public profession of that faith, and to be baptized in the main church services. Some churches apply more pressure on the youth pastor for this than others, but most of us have been guilty being overeager in leading a new student to faith in Christ in an effort to validate our ministries as more than clean entertainment. I have personally led too many students to make spiritual decisions who I knew were confused and needed more time to consider the claims of Christ. My motivation usually was to produce conversion numbers that would impress my pastoral staff.

In 2 Samuel 24, it is recorded that David wanted to get an accurate count of just how successful he was. He decided to take a census of his army to prove how great and powerful he really was. David’s general Joab challenged him,

“May the Lord your God multiply the troops a hundred times over, and may the eyes of my lord the king see it. But why does my lord the king want to do such a thing?” (24:3)

Why? To revel in his success! David lost sight of the true source of success and wanted to take the credit for himself. Like David, I want to feel important and validated in my ministry work. But, like David, I have learned that God doesn’t like to share the glory for His work.

What God Thinks…

Even though my heart and mind had been changed, it took the passing of time to completely change my perspective. As the years went by, many of my students graduated out of my ministry and became adults…and an alarming number walked away from the church and from their relationship with the Lord. Some of these students were strong, enthusiastic leaders in my ministry and their high school, yet they lost that enthusiasm when their days under my leadership ended. After all the time we had spent together, I was frustrated.

Then one day I was reading over a passage in Matthew 22:34-40 that helped me to understand what I was missing.

Hearing that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees, the Pharisees got together. One of them, and expert in the law, tested Him with this question: “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” Jesus replied, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment, And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commands.”

As I slowly read over the answer of Jesus, God began to show me how He thinks about success. For me be successful in ministry, I needed to encourage students to love God with everything they have and to serve Him by loving and serving other people in their own lives and around the world. The thought occurred to me that this had nothing to do with big crowds or programs or me and my desires at all.

God prompted me to ask myself this simple question, “What is the goal of my youth ministry?” After much prayer and reflection, I answered that it was ultimately to make myself seem important. (ouch!) I truly had a love for youth and wanted to see them grow in their faith, but I had a greater need to be loved and wanted and appreciated. I confessed this to God and asked Him to show me His ways. God showed me that He created ministry so that His people could come to love Him and serve Him for a lifetime. Looking back on my past ministries, this had never been the clear focus of what we planned. The thought was always there to teach students to love God, but we never had a long-term plan to teach them how to love Him and how to love each other.

Immediately, my perspective concerning my ministry began to change. I stopped counting every teenager (or stray dog) who wandered by, I cleared the unnecessary events from the calendar, I avoided the “Hallelujah Chorus” that followed me around singing my praises, and I repented for my hunger for validation. I prayed for God’s leadership in restructuring my ministry and asked Him to teach me how to apply my newly found understanding success. Over time, the youth ministries under my leadership began to embrace this mission. Not every student was responsive, and some walked away from church after high school. But, a much a greater number of students have truly connected with God and our ministry. Many are now adults serving in various ministries around the country.

Today, I am convinced that my ministry is successful every time I have lunch with a college-aged student who tells me about their growing relationship with Jesus and the new church and new ministries they have “plugged into” at college. I can sense that God is smiling and I am encouraged by His approval. I drive back to the church excited about my opportunity to influence the “bunch” of students God has placed under my care.